Dark Corners
(This essay is dedicated to any single people who may have felt left out during “On Being Engaged.”)
The Joseph Smith Academy didn’t put very many rules in place for us students, but Brother Dahl did offer some guidelines. One of these was the avoidance of Dark Corners.1 The existence of engaged people in the room suggested that at least some of us already knew about Dark Corners, and Brother Dahl was very aware that we are an educated generation—if not in the Classics, then at least in the merits of Dark Corners. [ill: sad truth]
One of Brother Dahl’s catch-phrases was “You can’t legislate biology.” This maxim was somewhat in opposition to the BYU-imposed rule of “No dating” for the JSA. (Incidentally, this rule has since been rescinded—but we’ll get to that later.) So here we are, unable to legislate biology, but legislating it all the same. Sounds like something Yossarian might have had to deal with. So, while dating dating was not allowed, and Dark Corners were most certainly not allowed, we weren’t about to go legislating biology. Follow me so far?
Dark Corners. Ooooo! The very thought feels me with horror! Both really and sarcastically. Being aware of the unlegislatability of biology, we cannot deny that Dark Corners have their danger, but being strapping youth, well, you know.
For the record, there was no Italian-restaurant-and-dancing dating going on at the Academy. But if we return to Dr Barlow?
Dr Barlow may have a very strict definition of engagement, but his definition of dating is extraordinarily loose. It’s merely a planned activity involving members of the opposite sex. So yes, Italian-restaurant-and-dancing is a date—as long as it wasn’t spontaneous. But if you offer to help load her car before she heads home next week for the summer holiday and she agrees? That’s gonna be a date. And this from the ring-and-announcement guy! I’m so confused.
So according to Dr Barlow, we were breaking the no dating policy everyday, and with enthusiasm. Even me, the engaged guy, yes, even I went on many dates that semester. But we’re not here to reveal my faults, but those of other people. That’s the prerogative of the book-writer.
Oh, those heinous JSA students! They make my bones yodel!
Our three months in the Academy did produce some pairings and gossip, but nothing genuinely Write-Home-About. In fact, from the position of months later, it’s hardly even worth remembering.
On the question of Dark Corners, however, it would be well to remind the reader that the JSA is remarkably round. And suddenly, having made that joke, I realize I’ve forced myself into a corner of my own (either get gossipy or leave this subject altogether). I am choosing the more moral choice and leaving Dark Corners for good.
return to the table of contents
Thanks for revisiting Nauvoo with me. I would love to hear your thoughts.