More from the Dear Theric Files
Date: Wed, 22 Mar 2000 12:32:53 MST
From: "Théric W. Jepson" </ / / / / / / /@hotmail.com>
To: / / / /@email.byu.edu
Subject: Flirting
As I have thought on this subject today, I have come to realize that it is much more complicated than I had originally realized. Now, as I only have seventeen minutes until class starts, I don't know if I will truly be able to fully explicate this subject for you, but I shall try. I am Theric.
FLIRTING
It seems to me that flirting can be broken down into two basic categories: Welcome and Unwelcome.
Another possible means of breaking flirting into two categories would be this: Purposeful and Unpurposeful.
Both of these methods are equally valid, but serve only to illustrate the complexity of the question, "What is flirting?"
(following from http://m-w.com)
Main Entry: 1flirt
Pronunciation: 'fl&rt
Function: verb
Etymology: origin unknown
Date: 1583
transitive senses
1 : FLICK
2 : to move in a jerky manner
intransitive senses
1 : to move erratically : FLIT
2 a : to behave amorously without serious intent b : to show superficial or casual interest or liking <flirted with the idea>; also : EXPERIMENT <a novelist flirting with poetry>
3 : to come close to -- used with with <the temperature flirted with 100°>
synonym see TRIFLE
- flir·ta·tion /"fl&r-'tA-sh&n/ noun
- flirt·er noun
- flirty /'fl&r-tE/ adjective
"To move in a jerky manner!" HaHaHa!!! That's so funny!
Of course, the definition we are interested in is this one, "to behave amorously without serious intent"—I think this is a fine definition.
There are four methods of so flirting: through words, looks, body language and touching.
1) WORDS
How does one behave amorously through words? By saying things with *connotations*. Anything, of course, can be fed connotation. I recall once in high school, my friend and I opened a favorite book of his and read random sentences. When you want it to be there, EVERYTHING has connotations. Really.
2) LOOKS
Research shows that widened pupils are more come-hither-ish than other eyes, but really, any eye contact could, feasibly be perceived as having amorous intent.
3) BODY LANGUAGE
Do you have a body? Then you have body language! Is there a body language dictionary? No. Therefore misunderstandings and misconstruings are the order of the day. If someone wants to see amorous content in your body's language, they will find it. This is unavoidable.
4) TOUCH
What I will say on touch is true of all the categories we have discussed, but is so much more so true of touch. Everyone was raised in a certain way regarding touch. Some families have no more intimate contact than a hand shake. Others are constantly hugging and holding hands. If someone from a hugging family gives physical attention to someone from a hand shaking family, chances of it being misunderstood are very high. But really, touching has to be the most amorous behavior anyway. C'est la crazy ways of humanity.
So what does this all mean? It means I'm not reaching any conclusions and it's time for class. It means that it's impossible not to flirt (short of locking oneself in a dusty tower). It means I'm not too helpful on this subject. If you ask, I'll write you again on why I think you are perceived as a flirt here at the Joseph Smith Academy.
Sincerely,
---theric---
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Thanks for revisiting Nauvoo with me. I would love to hear your thoughts.